“Respect your elders!” It is a saying that many of us have heard time and time again. As kids it may have been drilled into us. The thing is though many of us do, but where should we draw the thin line? Also, is there a thin line that should be drawn with regards to the elderly? See, nowadays there are some elders that are taking this saying to the extreme, using it to their advantage.
Respect Those That Respect You
See, as a child having been raised in the UK, us Brits are famous for blurting out pleases and thank you, sorry etc. The thing is, it is part of the culture. Well , for some anyhow! Naturally, along with that comes the preaching about how you should respect your elders. In many countries and cultures it is pretty much the same. However. one thing that is starting to come to my attention nowadays is there are actually some elders that do not warrant your respect. The older I get, and the more I start to understand things, I realize that some elders have infact not got basic manners.
Respect Is A Two Way Thing
See, respect is something that works both ways. Now, as a mother I have no idea how I’ll be able to convert this advice to my kids in a mannerism that will not have them portrayed as rude outside. The thing is though I don’t care. See, I have watched many scenarios and have seen examples in life that have made me very skeptical as to whether the whole respect your elders rule is to be abided by.
Elders Taking The Biscuit!
No, they don’t steal biscuits from the tin. What is done however, is they abuse their place in society as an elder and use forms of manipulation and hierarchy in society. Take for example the time I sent my 12 and 6 year old into the store to purchase candy, and their “elders” pushed in front of them. Infact it angered me to the point that I wanted to rush out of the car and scream in their defense not to queue jump! Those elders were proably round about the same age as me, yet as my kids have respect for elders they considered “big” people to be priority over their own needs.
You Give You Take
See some elders think that kids are small, they should have no voice or opinion. It’s not just kids either, there are elderly people around that think because they have done more years on the planet, they consider themselves to be much wiser and worthier of respect than others. Grandparents, aunties, uncles, anyone that is older than your kids. You need to raise your kids to take advice and respect them to an EXTENT. You don’t want to be in a situation one day where you’re faced with an elder dishing out advice that totally disregards your own upbringing and beliefs. For example, there are some grandparents that would love to pollute the minds of younger generations.
Old Fashioned Beliefs And Opinions
They have old style beliefs that they hold close to their hearts and will. The point is though, if you as a parent do not agree, you have every damn right for those opinions and views to be kept away and blindsided from your kids way. That is of course why you have been given the role as a parent to begin with. To raise the child the way that YOU want them to be raised. Need I say anymore?
Also one issue is when you mention anything about what someone older has done to offend you , you can be pushed to the side as over sensitive, too emotional, or plain rude for having the guts to stand up and speak up about something hat you believe goes against your point of view. What if some elders have taketh the law into their own hands quiet literally? Would you standby and keep quiet if they were dishing out inappropriate and offensive advice that completely undermines all you believe in?
Contradictory Beliefs Of Elders- Viewpoints That Are Offensive
A prime example for this would be elderly people that wish to force their points to youth. See, when we raise children to respect we need to also make them understand that there is a fine line that should not be crossed. Something that is considered as offensive to them, their parents or that directly or indirectly disses or insults the beliefs of their parent ,that is where there thin line should not be crossed. An example would be if a child would be to visit their grandparents, and the elder that is to be respected started to dish out pre marital advice that has racist view points, to not to mix from other counties. To not interbred etc. this is that very thin line that is a prime example of where elders are literally taking the biscuit and purposely, using manipulation in their position of hierarchy.
To summarize, in 2021 whilst it is still important as parents to try and raise credible human beings. Kids that are well mannered and hold values in society. It’s also important to make sure that the next generation understand when some elders haven’t got respect of themselves. Especially in cases where elders undermine the authority of the parent. Therefore it is not necessary to rally around them and feel sympathy, giving them any more status than what they deserve. See, respect is a to way thing, don’t you think?